Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Zombie Apocalypse First Aid Kit

You knew it would happen sooner or later, a deadly virus has been released from a secret underground government laboratory and has converted half the earth’s population into brain munching undead. As zombies roam the countryside in search of fresh meat, it is your obligation to make sure you have organized a first aid kit that provides ample assistance to you and your family should someone in your inner circle become injured.

A first aid kit should be matched to the individual, the situation and distance from help. For example, someone with an allergic reaction to bee stings hiking alone across a desert 25 miles from the nearest outpost of civilization will require a completely different medical kit then a mountaineer. I mean how many bee stings and heat related injuries will occur on a glacier at 20,000 feet? While you certainly are able to buy a medical kit that will meet MANY of your needs, you will quickly find that organizing your own kit ensures it will contain ALL the items you will need.

In this degree of apocalyptic catastrophe, you will obviously need to be prepared for any and all contingencies and it will pay to have a number of components in your kit that will allow you to render first aid assistance across a large spectrum of injuries and illnesses.

The Red Cross recommends that all STANDARD first aid kits for a family of four include the following:
* 2 absorbent compress dressings (5 x 9 inches)
* 25 adhesive bandages (assorted sizes)
* 1 adhesive cloth tape (10 yards x 1 inch)
* 5 antibiotic ointment packets (approximately 1 gram)
* 5 antiseptic wipe packets
* 2 packets of aspirin (81 mg each)
* 1 blanket (space blanket)
* 1 breathing barrier (with one-way valve)
* 1 instant cold compress
* 2 pair of nonlatex gloves (size: large)
* 2 hydrocortisone ointment packets (approximately 1 gram each)
* Scissors * 1 roller bandage (3 inches wide)
* 1 roller bandage (4 inches wide)
* 5 sterile gauze pads (3 x 3 inches)
* 5 sterile gauze pads (4 x 4 inches)
* Oral thermometer (non-mercury/nonglass)
* 2 triangular bandages
* Tweezers
* First aid instruction booklet
* Personal medications or other items suggested by your health-care provider.

Remember to check the kit regularly. Check expiration dates and replace any used or out-of-date contents.

Of course during the Zombie Apocalypse the recommendations of the Red Cross will be woefully inadequate. After all, battling the undead is bone breaking; shoulder disjointing, ligament tearing, heavy arterial bleeding work, so make sure to pack in some serious first aid hardware. Tops on the list are Sam SplintsIsraeli bandage, tourniquets, Quick Clot, a small surgical kit, giant super blood absorbing gauze pads, large hypodermic needle for washing out deep wounds, large square bandages for wrapping damaged extremities, sutures or staple kit and several extra cartridges of zombie stomping 12 gauge 00 buckshot rounds.

 Since having the right medical kit is practically worthless without some level of training, it pays to at a minimum take a first aid and CPR class and do some additional reading. I suggest, two of my favorite reads, “Where there are no doctors” and “Where there are no dentists”.

It should be noted that as a Maine guide, frequently guiding clients well into the backcountry and no where near medical attention, the Zombie Apocalypse First Aid Kit is a valuable resource to have at your disposal. With the proper training, the kit is adequate to handle everything from a small scrape to a bullet wound. Please when venturing into the Maine woods, be sure to be adequately prepared!


  1. We keep well-stocked first aid kits in the cars and 2 in the house.
    Vet wrap is a great (and cheap) addition to our kits, along with sterile eye wash. If someone is going to get a hideous zombie bit in their eye, it will be me.

    Loved the post!

    1. Great idea to keep on in the car AND having house based kits as well. I also keep one in the garage and a small kit in my tackle box and hunting back pack!

      It always surprises me how the second that I don't have access to a first aid kit someone gets hurts and it is needed.

      Zombie bite to the eye! OUCH! That is going to require A LOT more than sterile eyewash! LOL!

      Thanks for commenting!

  2. You are so funny!!! But smart too. Zombies catch my attention and then the recommended supplies.
    I'd like to see which weapons you recommend for use during the zombie apocalypse in the next article, please.

    1. Thanks Mia! Hmmmm, good idea for a future blog posting! Of course my favorites would have to be the AR15, 12g shotgun and 9mm Glock for the Zombie Apocalypse! :)

  3. Studies have shown that zombies are real! Check out this article about a fungus that mind controls insects. That being the case, I would add some transparent dressings, like Dermaview, to allow you to observe the bite wound. This way you can amputate in the nick of time if things start to get hairy.


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