The idea for the following post was generated after I recently read a post created by Scent Free Lip Gloss. Her post entitled "A Few of My Favorite Things" is a reflection on the quality of this fine lady. It would not surprise me to find that she regularly goes to church, volunteers in a soup kitchen and gives vocal lessons to angels. I, however, have a healthy amount of sarcasm that frequently appears in my writing, therefore my post looks in a different perhaps slightly skewed direction.
A Few of My Least Favorite Things:
Rain during daylight hours. I mean honestly why haven't scientists figured out how to stop this from happening!
Hiking boots and sneakers that have to be "broken" in and blister my feet! We can send a man to the moon but can't mold plastic and foam to fit feet?
Blackflies, mosquitoes and basically any other blood sucking insect that seeks to destroy my time in the Maine woods.
Jello . . . Any food that wiggles just can't be trusted. I am also extremely mistrustful of jelly and jam.
Buckshot . . . It wounds deer and should only be used in specific circumstances. You know like if someone is breaking and entering your home and exactly what you want to do is seriously wound them.
Seatbelt and helmet laws for those over 18. Yes, I understand the reason for this law but at some point people need to be free to decide their own destiny.
Campfire smoke in your eyes.
Heavy mountaineering backpacks in excess of 70 lbs. Yeah, I used to carry them but that isn't to say I liked it!
Pickled beets . . . Honestly can you think of anything more foul . . . Well other than grits.
Starbucks . . . If I wanted a double late cappuccino with soy milk and sugar in the raw I would move to Europe.
Country music . . . If there is a purgatory "Buffalo Girls" will be played over and over for all eternity. On the other hand, in heaven, I could see "Buffalo Soldier" being played over and over while I sit back on a huge fluffy cloud and drink ice cold lemonade.
MREs (Meals Ready to Eat) sorry but food should not have a 50 year shelf life.
Logs, rocks, stumps and any other below the water hidden obstruction that breaks the sheer pin on my motor or steals my new 10 dollar fishing lure.
Thanks for reading. I hope you enjoyed my unusual looks at some of the things that generally try my patience. Please unleash your inner cynic by adding to the post a few things that really get you going!
I will do my best to incorporate this list upon the means to our next adventure...ReplyDelete
Your a good friend buddy . . . one of the best . . . BUT for the love of God change your profile pic!ReplyDelete
Okay I have to comment on this one. First of all, thanks for the compliment - I think. But I do have to set the record straight. I can't sing. I wish I could. I sing in the shower and in the car with the windows rolled up. So, the heavenly hosts will be teaching me a thing or two on the other side of heaven, unless you can automatically sing well once you arrive. We shall see. :)ReplyDelete
I also have to disagree with some of your least favorite things... Rain during daylight can at times be delightful, as long as it is a warm summer day and there are puddles to run through of course. When hunting though, I'm finding the smallest pine tree to hide under (big ones attract lighting).
And jello? How can you not love jello? Especially at Easter. We used to make jello easter eggs. However, there was enough gelatin in those babies that no one would eat them. The only thing you could use them for was sling shot jello fights. Not that I'm promoting that.
As far as some of my least favorite things.. belly button lint, miller moths, and barney the dinosaur
Okay I'm stopping now so I don't clog up any more of your comment space.
Thanks for the laugh!
Emily, thanks for being a good sport and glad you found my introduction humorous.ReplyDelete
Death by Jello Projectile? You have given me yet another reason to mistrust Jello!
How can you not like belly button lint!?!? Its a great fire starter and could ultimately save your life in a survival situation! :)
Take care and great comments!
"Starbucks . . . If I wanted a double late cappuccino with soy milk and sugar in the raw I would move to Europe."
I live in Blighty, I've been all over Europe and a few of your states. You seem like a nice chap, you write a humorous blog which I'll always have in my RSS feeds, but buster, enough is enough. AMERICA is the home of CRAP COFFEE. Starbucks is both rubbish and an American company. You can - if you put in the effort - get a decent cup of coffee in ol' blighty but really if you want a good coffee mainland europe is the place to go. Except France.
I am a total "buster" . . . mea culpa, mea culpa. lol!ReplyDelete
You da man for setting me straight! :)
Rude People: Like your rain during the day comment, I would think that science would have figured out a way to genetically remove them from the planet...They are total day killer.ReplyDelete
Drama: Dislike more than rude people, although they may be the source of drama....will get my scientists on this immediately.
I have to concure with most of your dislikes minus country music. Not to say I am a huge fan or anything, just can't take guitars whaling away in my ears for too long.
Great blog, you have a new follower: see you in the woods.
WIlbur, Thanks for commenting and following along!Delete
I have to admit that occasionally I surrender to the country played by Hank Jr, WIllie and Waylon.